Notas de viaje de dos malungos, note di viaggio di due malunghi: Colombia, Italia, India, Nepal, Thailandia, Burma/Myanmar.

Let the river flow.

DSC_6225pIt is the Ganga.

Or maybe it’s the Danube, or the Guadalquivir, or the river Bogotá (there is a river Bogotá), or the Po, or the Navigli or even the Boate.

It is flowing.

It has always been flowing.

You are inside.

Your life, the persons you met, the places you’ve been, what you did, what you do.

It is flowing, and it is you.

Your thoughts, many many thoughts, like a cascade of thinking, forms, images, names, simbols, roles, words.

DSC_6062pYou try to swim, yes, to swim, to a direction, to a goal, to something that you want to reach.

There, yes, it’s there you must go, it’s there they told you that you should go, it’s there that it is normal to swim, that you are supposed to swim.

You swim opposing the current and it is so difficult, so tiring, the waves of water come towards you, they go in your throat, and the more you put efforts, the more the current is strong and you have to fight against the flow, every day.

I must stay the same, I must stay here in the middle of the water, no movement, stability, no-change.

You use all my energies, efforts, money, time, all my life, to close my eyes shut and swim against the waves, because nothing has to ever change, because I must pay a 30-years loan for my house, because I have dependants, because I am dependant, because of all the things that are mine, my house, my car, my dog, my husband, my wife, my religion, my party, my TV, I need them, they need me.

I struggle, I fight against the flow, because I have a position, a reputation, a title in front of my name, a Mr. Mrs. Ing. Avv. Phd. Dr. in front of my name, because I have a status and a form.

Because I have a position.

Because I have a name.

I have a name.

But I am not my name.

I am not my name.

Frustration, misery, insatisfaction, anger.

DSC_6297pSo I stop for a minute, the river is all around me.

Flowing, naturally flowing, keeping on flowing.

Total indifferent of my efforts.

Just flowing.

I open my eyes.

And I surrender to the river flowing around, and I start following the wave.

I let it go.

I just let it go.

And instantaneously the current calms itself.

Because I am calming myself.

I let it go, I let it flow.

There is no goal, there is no direction, there is nothing to fight against.

The river flows, it has always been flowing, it will be flowing with me, or without me.

The river keeps flowing, changing, Panta rei, and myself I keep flowing and changing into it.

Into the same rivers we step and do not step. We are and we are not.

Potamoís tois autois embainomén de kai ouk embainomen,

eimen de kai out eimen (Heraclitus 49a)

DSC06283pI follow the wave. I have a sweet taste in my mouth.

It is quiet. And calm.

There are no names, no title. No yesterday, no tomorrow.

No there, no here.

No me, no you.

And I realize that I am watching myself in the river while I am sitting on the side of it.

I am inside, and outside.

I observe myself and the river passing, like everything is passing.

I witness myself my wave and the movement.

DSC_6749pAnd I realize that all the waves flow one into the other.

No one is a separate flow, everybody flows dependentely, there is no indipendent wave.

All of them flow, all of us are a only part.

All of us are a part of the river.

We are and we are not.

The river flows.

I am the river and I am not the river.

I am and I am not.

I smile.

L.

One response

  1. Paula

    Tu sonrisa es la mía misma, es ésta que nace del sonido de dos ríos, del que es uno sólo y por si mismo.

    Juntos descubrimos el sonido de este río, su fluir. ¡Es una fortuna!

    4 January, 2011 at 1:44 am

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